my team

"In my life I have only in recent times consciously built a support team. For most of the last two decades, my inner mantra has been some crazy idea that I can do it on my own. Some heroic and impossible delusion. Finally I have woken up to this...the joy of life is doing things with great people. Partnering, supporting others, getting supported. Putting your hand up, asking for help, building a team...Solo is an illusion and just plain silly." -Christine McDougall


Christine got me thinking about various teammates of mine over the years.  Here are just a few.  I am so grateful for them!

Merry Christmas

Our Savior was born so we could live!  I am thankful for this time to celebrate Him, and I'm reminded that every day is a day to celebrate the gift of Christ in my life.


Today I enjoyed watching this beautiful video to remind me of some of the miraculous events surrounding the Savior's birth--and to remind me of the greatest miracle of all: His life.  


I also enjoyed listening to these songs:





Merry Christmas and God bless. 
May we always rejoice in Christ's light and love.

happy winter!

My roommates and I celebrated the beginning of the season back in November, and I'm finally getting around to posting some pics :) (Thanks to Ariel for the pics from her iphone)

After attending BYU's production of "White Christmas," Ariel and I enjoyed the first snow of the year as we walked home from the performance. 

Ariel baked yummy Christmas treats, including gingerbread houses for us to decorate.

We had an early Christmas party and decorated gingerbread houses with friends.

The beautiful, talented Norienne

Emily eating some of the "snow" 

Elise and me

Elise and Ariel

Chrissy decorating

Kaity Kait

Kait taking a nap

Ariel and I both love Christmas socks :)

finals week for a cat

Finals week and Ariel's cat, Kalamazoo, is busy at work.

not for smooth skin, but because we are God's

I looked up into the eyes of an elderly woman today.
I saw depth and light.
As her wrinkled face looked down on mine,
I wanted to keep looking into her blue eyes.
I wanted to hear her life.

"Thanks for coming," she said.
"You're beautiful."


I was thinking the same thing about you.

***
I looked straight into the mirror at my own eyes tonight.
I saw depth and light.
As my face looked back at me,
I wanted to keep looking into my hazel eyes.

I remembered the woman's presence.
(I want to hear her.)

I thought about
beauty, wisdom
youth, aging
living, dying.

***
Some young want their youth forever,
Some old want to take back their youth.

I'll welcome memories and seasons,
they're accompanying wrinkles
and wear.

A body will grow weary
A spirit will grow light.

***

We are beautiful, not for smooth skin, but because we are God's.


Listen!
He speaks, You are Mine. 

Happy Monday :)

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Warner Sallman, The Head of Christ

Isaiah, Isaiah 12:

O Lord, I will praise thee: though thou wast angry with me, thine anger is turned away, and thou comfortesdst me.  Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the Lord Jehovah is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation...Praise the Lord, call upon his name, declare his doings among the people, make mention that his name is exalted.  Sing unto the Lord; for he hath done excellent things: this is known in all the earth.  Cry out and shout, thou inhabitant of Zion: for great is the Holy One of Israel in the midst of thee.  

David, Psalm 19:

The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple.  The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart: the commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes.  The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever: the judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.  More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold: sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.  Moreover by them is thy servant warned: and in keeping of them there is great reward.  Who can understand his errors?  cleanse thou me from secret faults.  Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent form the greater transgression.  Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.  

Nephi, 2 Nephi 4:

Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God and the rock of my salvation.  O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul?  Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies?  Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin?  May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite!  O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!  O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness!  O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine enemies!  Wilt thou make my path straight before me!  Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way--but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy. O Lord, I have trusted in thee and I will trust in thee forever.  

food for your brain and for energy

This week I ate a lot of processed, sugary food because I was too "busy" to prepare real food.  Well the thing is, I am never too busy to prepare real food--I just think I am--and besides, eating junk makes me function like junk, so I end up wasting time anyway.  Also I don't sleep well, get bags under my eyes, and my skin starts freaking out--yuck.

This finals week I am going to eat well so I can feel well, sleep well, study well, and have a clear brain that helps me do well on finals.  Here are some quick, easy, healthy, YUMMY meals that will fuel your brain and body:

My "Ultimate" Oatmeal
-Oatmeal
-1/2 cup frozen blueberries
-Honey
-1 Tbsp Ground flaxseed
-Almond milk

In the bottom of a bowl, place frozen blueberries and defrost.  Add prepared oatmeal, honey, flaxseed, and almond milk to taste.

My Favorite Green Smoothie
-water (1 cup to 2 cups, depending on whether you want more of a smoothie texture or more of a juice)
-Spinach (lots)
-1 Tbsp ground flax seed (optional)
-1 apple or pear
-1 orange
-1.5 cups frozen mangoes (you can find big bags of frozen mangoes at Sam's club.  You can also use frozen blueberries or strawberries instead of mangoes)
-a few ice cubes

(Makes 4-5 cups--a good breakfast, lunch, or pre/post-workout meal)

This is best made in a Vitamix or another powerful blender.  Mix water, spinach, flax together.  Add apple and orange; mix.  Finally, add mangoes and ice; mix.

Chocolate Almond Smoothie (Brenden Brazier, from his book Thrive: The Vegan Nutrition Guide to Optimal Performance in Sports and Life)

-1 banana

-2 fresh or soaked dry dates

-2 cups cold water (or 1 cup plus 1 cup ice) 

-1/4 cup almonds (if you don't have a Vitamix blender, use 2 tablespoons almond butter instead) 

-1 tbsp ground flaxseed 

-1 tbsp hemp protein 

-1 tbsp roasted carob powder

Blend.  Makes 2 servings.

Pumpkin and Bean Soup 

-2 cans of black beans, drained and rinsed

-1 can (14.5 oz) diced tomatoes   

-1 can pumpkin (16 oz) puree

-2 gloves of garlic minced

-1/2 C red onion chopped

-2 Tbsp olive oil

-4 C vegetable broth

1 Tbsp ground cumin

1 tsp salt

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp allspice

1/2 tsp ground pepper

3 Tbsp balsamic vinegar

Place oil, red onion, garlic and seasonings into large pot.  Cook on low-medium heat until onion and garlic brown.  Puree the beans and tomatoes with half of the vegetable broth. Add pureed ingredients, pumpkin and rest of broth to pot.  Simmer uncovered until thick, about 40-45 minutes. Before serving, stir in balsamic vinegar.

Italian Four Bean Soup

-1/3 cup water

-1 onion, chopped

-1/2 teaspoon minced garlic (or more)

-1 bunch kale, chopped (I have also used spinach)

-3 cups vegetable broth

-14.5 oz can chopped tomatoes

-15 oz can kidney beans, drained and rinsed

-15 oz can garbanzo beans, drained and rinsed

-15 oz can red beans, drained and rinsed

-15 oz can white beans (Great Northern Beans), drained and rinsed

-15 oz can white beans, drained and MASHED

-1 teaspoon Italian seasoning

-pepper

Place the water, onion, and garlic in a large pot. Cook and stir for 3 minutes. Add the kale and cook and stir for 2 minutes. Add the broth, tomatoes, drained beans, Italian seasoning, and pepper. Bring to a boil, cover and simmer for 10 minutes. Add the mashed beans.  Cook for an additional 10 minutes.  

Yams or acorn squash

The ultimate easy meals.  (And inexpensive.) You don't have to add anything to them.  For yams, cut the ends off them and poke them a few times with a fork.  Cook in the oven at 450 degrees for 1 hr to 1.5 hours.  

For acorn squash, cut in half, scoop out the insides, and cook at 375 degrees for 45 min to 1 hr.  If it's good squash, you shouldn't have to add anything for taste.  If it's not so great, a little butter, salt and pepper go a long way :)

Snack ideas:

Avocados

Almonds

Fill celery with Adam's all-natural peanut butter and raisins


Collard or Kale Chips (thanks, Kerri, for the recipe!)

Wash and dry collards or kale. Tear leaves into smaller pieces. Place on baking sheet and spray with olive oil spray. Add salt and pepper to taste.  Bake at 350 for 9-11 minutes till crispy.  Yummy :) 

the person as a gift

This video is simply beautiful.  I like how she compares a mother's unconditional love to God's unconditional love for His children.

The only thing I disagree with is how she says newborns have nothing to give.  The experience of holding a newborn is a gift in itself because it is an opportunity for us to feel God's love.  The newborn, then, gives a gift to her mother simply by existing.  

If I am right, this has important implications for God's love for us.  It would imply that although we have nothing visible to give God, our lives are gifts to God because we are His.  No wonder God's "work and...glory" is to "bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man" (Moses 1:39).

Could we say that God wants to live with each of us forever because each of our lives is a gift to Him?  

Perhaps this is why President Uchtdorf explained, "Every person...is a VIP to our Heavenly Father." (The whole talk is excellent, but for the specific quote, fast forward to 8 minutes into his talk.)

being human: an incentive to fight pornography

I try to cool down about certain issues, but I won’t calm down about pornography—and I find no reason to, no matter how many people choose to ignore the facts.  Due to the widespread, open acceptance of pornography in our society, many are reluctant to speak out against the topic—or even bring it up—because they fear offending the many people who view porn.

But regardless of whether or not a large portion of the human population indulges in any given practice, the practice is either acceptable or unacceptable.  Pornography is unacceptable.  Sociologists and psychologists have studied its effects; among the many sickening effects, a few that stand out to me are: Porn exploits women, men, and children; porn changes the way a person’s mind works—it leads to abnormal sex addictions; porn leads to criminal behavior; porn leads to the breakdown of the family unit (usually beginning with unfaithful husbands or wives).  Blatantly obvious from these facts alone, we see that pornography has caused, is causing, and will continue to cause societal decay.  (Apparently, though, the "societal decay" part hasn't sunk into people's heads because people are still seeking out porn, including 40 million regular American online viewers. The worldwide industry today is worth 4.9 billion.)

One of the most alarming things I realized about pornography from reading To Plead Our Own Cause: Personal Stories by Today's Slaves is that pornography keeps the human trafficking industry in booming business.  It's so obvious, but I guess I hadn't considered it until it was placed right in front of my face in a book.

But really, how many of us actually have even a small idea of what's going on? (If more of us did know, we'd be doing more about it, right?) Many people like me have no idea, so that's why I'm trying to learn more and get the word out.  If you want a wake-up call about the human slave trade (and not just the sex trade, but other forms of slavery as well), look into this book.  These are testimonies from our brothers and sisters whose voices should be heard.

I typed up one of the accounts because it is so important that each of us read real accounts of real people.  Many of us will never know this kind of suffering, so it is especially important that we listen to the actual sufferers so we can know what needs to be done to protect our fellow man--to work to protect all of God's children.  This is from a survivor whose name is changed in the book to protect her identity.  She is called "Christine."  Her words speak for themselves, standing as a powerful voice against the selfishness, filthiness, and absolute inhumanity of pornography and all other human exploitation and torture.

Christine says:

"I was born a slave.  I was born into sexual slavery in the state of Minnesota in the United States of American twenty-nine years ago. I was born into a prostitution ring, a family of pimps and pornographers and prostitutes.  The men pimped the women and girls and sometimes the boys.  They made pornography.  They sold us in whorehouses and at live sex shows.  The men used me in pornography in basements, barns, houses, warehouses, isolated wooded areas, and public buildings.

         I come from the farms and suburbs and cities of the United States of America.  I come from the strangled, suffocated, mangled voices of the raped, beaten, and starved.  I was trafficked throughout the country, from state to state by car, by bus, and by plane.  I am not alone standing here before you today.  I am not alone in my testimony, and I am not alone in my spirit.  I have many friends and acquaintances who have endured the tortures, rapes, beatings, and degradations that pimps and johns hand out like candy.

         In prostitution rings women and girls are taught to be sexually submissive by men who refer to themselves as masters, by men who are so cowardly as to rape, beat, and starve women and girls.  Women and girls raised in prostitution rings are sexually abused and otherwise tortured beginning in infancy.  They are trained to be prostitutes, to sexually service men.  The men are masters of torture and terror who are highly trained in torture techniques.  Sometimes these pimp masters are doctors and dentists in the ouside world.  They rape girls as young as one and two years old.

         I was one such girl.  I can tell you some of the things they did to me and other girls and women, but there is still much I cannot speak of.  These men gang rape us.  They rape us with dogs.  They rape us with knives and guns and beer bottles.  They tie us down, chain us to bedposts and basement poles and each other.  They make us eat shit and maggots and urine.  They rape us with masks on their faces.  They rape us in the name of Satan and Hitler and De Sade.  They rape us in front of our mothers and grandmothers; they rape our grandmothers and mothers in front of us.  They play games with us.  They force us to choose who will live, which child or aunt or grandmother will live and which one will die.  They hold mock executions. 

         But sometimes they do kill us.  You never know when they’re only joking, having some fun, or when they will pull the trigger.  These men want us, the women and girls being raped, to feel responsible for their actions.  They want us to feel like it is our fault that our mother, sister, daughter, grandmother is being destroyed in front of our eyes…

         The men who use us throw us away.  We are their garbage to piss on, to pile up in the corner.  We are their property, they own us.  The rest of you turn your backs, avert your eyes, pretend not to see, go on your way.  You leave us to the predators.

         But we endure…I stayed alive because my belief in something better than what they offered was greater than their hatred and destruction.  I stayed alive because I wanted to be free—more than anything, I wanted to be free.  I wanted to live in a world of respect.  I wanted to be free from them.  I wanted their hands off me; I wanted their bodies off me and their dicks out of me.  I wanted to not be sold.  I wanted to not be bought.  I wanted to not be raped and filmed and forced to smile and beg and plead for mercy.  I wanted them to stop telling me who and what I was.  I wanted to decide how I felt, what I thought, what I believed, and who I loved.  I wanted to eat the foods that I wanted to eat, run the way I wanted, be silly or thoughtful or serious.  Quite simply, I wanted a life of autonomy and agency…

         It is only recently that I have been free from their sexual and physical abuse, and to be honest, I don’t always know what to do with myself.  I was beaten and raped, or at least verbally assaulted, virtually every day of my life.  The intentensity of my emotions doesn’t match up to a normal life.  Other survivors talk about this, too.  Even though we have escaped, we live in the pimp’s world.  We have flashbacks and night tremors.  The pimps harass us, so we spend much of our time waiting, wondering when they’re going to hurt us again.  Our worldview is one of war, constant rapes, and beatings.  We may escape, but we will always be isolated, we will never be part of society.  We know too much, we have seen too much.  The world does not want to acknowledge the truth of women’s lives…

         There are many women, strong women brave women all across the world who are rising up to meet and to end the tidal wave of male violence against women.  We escape and we organize and we educate and we go back down into the trenches to pull out our sisters.  This is war, a battle of life and death…

         We must be on the lookout for eachother…As I go back, back into the brothels and porn houses, I will be on the lookout for you.  I hope I will never find you there, but if I do, you have my word that I will lend you my hand.”

***

We are not machines.  Lets not "turn [our] backs, avert [our] eyes, pretend not to see, go on [our] way" when we see injustice and immorality.  We are human beings with empathy.  Lets be the kind of humans willing to give up whatever it takes in order to correct something wrong--whether that be personal addictions or time and other personal resources needed to speak up against, combat, and prevent further wrongs against our fellow human beings.

Evidence of God: The Orion Nebula

(Thanks to NASA for the photo of this and many other beauties.)

Two short thoughts:

1. When I see things like this I wonder:  How could we doubt the existence of God?  He is The Creator.  Also I wonder how we could doubt the existence of life beyond where we are now?  As much as I love my life on planet Earth, there is clearly more in store.  If I believed this short experience on Earth is all there is to my existence, I'd feel considerably massively gypped.

2. When I see things like this I am terribly aware that I know close to nothing about what is and what will be.  But you know, that's okay.  It keeps a sense of wonder in my soul, and I think that's healthy.

why we should stop whining :)

Brigham Young said it 150 years ago and I think it applies more than ever today when we so often, and so quickly, use social networking to get messages across to others:


"If persons think they have greater sorrow and affliction than any others, when they reveal that sorrow and affliction, it produces fruit. You frequently hear brethren and sisters say that they feel so tried and tempted, and have so many cares, and are so buffeted, that they must give vent to their feelings; and they yield to the temptation, and deal out their unpleasant sensations to their families and neighbours. Make up your minds thoroughly, once for all, that if we have trials, the Lord has suffered them to be brought upon us, and he will give us grace to bear them; and that they do not concern our families, friends, and neighbours, we can bear them off alone. But if we have light or intelligence—that which will do good, we will impart it; but our bad feelings, our desponding feelings, our dark hours, and disagreeable sensations we will keep to ourselves.  


Let that be the determination of every individual, for spirit begets spirit... feelings beget their likeness...If, then, we give vent to all our bad feelings and disagreeable sensations, how quickly we beget the same in others, and load each other down with our troubles, and become sunk in darkness and despair!  If you have anything good to say, speak it...If you have that which tends to death, keep it to yourselves: we do not want it, for we already have plenty of it.


In all your social communications...let all the dark, discontented, murmuring, unhappy, miserable feelings—all the evil fruit of the mind, fall from the tree in silence and unnoticed; and so let it perish, without taking it up to present to your neighbours. But when you have joy and happiness, light and intelligence, truth and virtue, offer that fruit abundantly to your neighbours, and it will do them good, and so strengthen the hands of your fellow-beings."


-Brigham Young, Journal of Discourses, Vol. 7 p.268-69, October 6, 1859. 

good reads (in fiction and philosophy)

Fiction

The Poisonwood Bible should change your life.  It should change the way you think about yourself, your behavior, and the worlds we--as cultures and nations--create.  It's brilliantly written, with characters so real that at times you might cry for them.  This is definitely the kind of book you WANT to affect you.  It's a must.   

Hilarious yet sobering.  Political.  You'll fall in love with Oskar, the nine-year-old protagonist.  Foer's writing style is unique, so be prepared for something deliciously different! 

The movie is coming out in January, so I definitely recommend reading the book before you see the show!  I'm sure the movie will be good, but you just can't capture Foer's writing in a movie(!!!!!)

Philosophy

I've been studying women and agency, and these two books are the most important (and interesting!) I've read thus far.  They are technical, so don't pick these up when you're looking for a quick page-turner or light read.  

Relational Autonomy. a collection of essays written by different feminists, outlines various theories on autonomy and argues that we need to change our definition of autonomy in order to make it relevant for women.  If you want to get a good introduction to issues regarding autonomy, this book is the place to begin. 

  Gender in the Mirror, written by Diana Meyers, consists of well-articulated, relevant arguments regarding women and agency.  I like that Meyers begins by explaining that we cannot remove gender from identity, and that she argues that in order for women to have autonomy, they need skills that allow them to maneuver in society.  Women can exercise agency in a patriarchal systems; however, patriarchal systems can oppress women by inhibiting their agentic skills.  


Meyers' work has excellent sections on maternal agency and on "women in the mirrors"--imagery of women circulating society and how it affects agency.

I don't agree with all of the ideas in these books, but that doesn't mean they aren't important to read. :)    

I'll keep my breasts, thank you.

I find it perplexing that during a time of Feminism, in our work toward equality, so many women want to get rid of the category of "Woman."

Can’t we remain Woman and be respected by Man?  Isn’t that the point?  If rather than embrace Womanhood, we instead try to get rid of our Woman-ness, we’re defeating the whole purpose of feminism.

Can you tell I’ve been reading RADICAL feminist theorists the past few weeks?  I’m growing weary of their rants.  The radicals want to get rid of my sex!!! Out with “Woman” because apparently, in order for Woman to be equal to Man, the sexes have to be eliminated. 

Wait—what?  So if you eliminate sex—maleness and femaleness—you get equality? Woah, woah, woah. I don't think so, sisters.

I kind of want to pour some cold water on these women to wake them out of their trance and then introduce myself:

“Hello, I am Woman.  I have breasts and a vagina.  I am different than Man.  Thank you very much.  That is my simple rebuttal to your long, 30 page article filled with technical terms and philosophical poop droppings.  I have basic biology on my side here."   

But what these women don't seem to get is that Woman-ness encompasses worlds more than possessing basic physical characteristics.  There is so much more to being Woman beyond the obvious differences that physically set us apart from Man.  And that's the beauty of gender!! Our differences complete each other--both when we physically become one flesh during sex and when we spiritually become one in the uniting bond of marriage.

I wish all feminists understood this necessary unification of Male and Female. I think then they'd understand what it means to be Woman.  And a woman who understands what it is to be WOMAN does not want to get rid of her woman-ness.  Cause she loves her woman-ness :) 

We as women do need societal reforms to take place in order to see equality, but an elimination of gender is not only biologically IMPOSSIBLE--it's also completely pointless in both our work toward equality and our work as human beings.

Devaluing my nature as Woman does not serve me. Ever.

I'll keep my breasts, thank you.

why i love being a woman

Painting by David Joaquin 

"Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come." -Proverbs 31:25




“Woman is God’s supreme creation. Only after the earth had been formed, after the day had been separated from the night, after the waters had been divided from the land, after vegetation and animal life had been created, and after man had been placed on the earth, was woman created; and only then was the work pronounced complete and good." -Gordon Hinckley 




“In a country where woman is insecure, she will give birth to insecure children, which will grow into insecure men and this will make the nation insecure. Security of the woman is the security of the nation.” -Yogi Bahjan 

Femininity “is the divine adornment of humanity. It finds expression in your… capacity to love, your spirituality, delicacy, radiance, sensitivity, creativity, charm, graciousness, gentleness, dignity, and quiet strength. It is manifest differently in each girl or woman, but each…possesses it. Femininity is part of your inner beauty.” –James Faust

“When the whole story of this [earth] is told, it will be filled with courageous stories of our women, of their wisdom and their devotion, their courage." –Spencer Kimball

"You are the grace of God." -Yogi Bahjan

life is beautiful because we get to CELEBRATE!

Life is beautiful because we get to celebrate all the happy things that go on in the lives of people we love.


I can't think of anything happier than seeing those I love truly happy!! 


I celebrate as people I love move to new phases in life.  I love seeing friends go off to college, come home after serving missions, celebrate birthdays and other milestones, go on adventures, produce art, begin careers, end unhealthy careers and pick up something else, achieve goals, fail goals and find new ones to focus on, FIND LOVE, have beautiful babies, find what they're passionate about, lose unnecessary burdens they've been carrying, find God or lose God for a while and come back with a fire--and just experience happiness in life!


It's so fun to see!!


I love all of you, my dear friends and family, and I am so happy for the great things going on in your lives :)  What a blessing it is to be able to take part in these celebrations.

Happy Thanksgiving month!

Thanksgiving is in one week(!!) 

I am thankful for God, family, friends, and all the beautiful people I get to meet. 

I am thankful for hands to write, play the piano, embrace other hands, flip through pages in books, place on a yoga mat, hold babies, cook, brush my teeth, try to eat with chopsticks, glue things together, and to do everything else I choose to use my hands for. 

I am thankful for teachers.  Every day so many people teach me.   

I'm thankful for how it feels to snuggle up in warm blankets.  

I am thankful for herbal tea.

I am thankful for my vitamix.

I am thankful for healthy, fresh food in abundance. 

I am thankful for hot cookies out of the oven--you know, when they melt in your mouth. 

I am thankful for my education. 

I'm thankful for temples. 

I am thankful for the warm apartment in which I live.

I am thankful for prophets and apostles.

I am thankful for Christ’s gospel.

I am thankful for eyes to see colors and nature and words and people and art and all other good things eyes can see.

I am thankful for happy times and sad times.  I am thankful for different seasons in life, and the things we learn in the different phases.

I am thankful for my mission call to Florida.  

I am thankful for my LIFE mission as well--what I’m here on EARTH to do. 

I am thankful for my mother’s long hugs.  I will never forget a few years ago after a nasty break-up with my boyfriend, I felt a real sense of betrayal for the first time.  My mom held my sobbing 18-year-old self for as long as I needed her.  Then she spent the night in my bedroom as I cried myself to sleep.  

I am thankful for Father’s blessings from my dad.  He listens and he conveys what the Spirit tells him.  I write down what I remember from his blessings and refer to them often.  These recorded blessings are some of my most important possessions.  

I am thankful for Kait’s hiccups and bird calls and other hilarious sounds.  I am thankful for her humor.  She can always lighten a situation.  She has a way of easing awkward situations by using humor. 

I am thankful for Shalane/Boohbah’s sweet smiles and for her giving nature.  She is always willing to share and go "above-and-beyond."  And she is one of the hardest workers I know.  

I am thankful for the four Carson family cats.  Yes, we are crazy cat people. I love those cats.  

I am thankful for not inheriting my mom’s cancer that killed both her father and her brother.  I am thankful for my mom’s life, thanks to advances in medicine (and God's hands).  I am also thankful that through her surgeries, she has survived and that her faith has remained.  I am thankful for her faith in God—and in people.  She loves people. 

I am thankful that my Dad taught me to love reading when I was a young child.  He'd finish a book and I'd say, "Again, Daddy!  Again!"  He would tirelessly read those books over, and over, and over--until we both fell asleep.  

Then later when I read on my own and fell in love with novels, he encouraged me to get all those AR points.  I am thankful he took me to every Harry Potter book premier.    

I am thankful for my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, my cousins, and for the experiences we've had together.  I miss them and they stay with me in spirit.  I remember the things they've taught me and the love they've shown me, and I am thankful I have these wonderful people to call my family.  

I am thankful that I was able to study abroad in Jerusalem. 

I am thankful for my dear roommates and best friends.  Ariel and Elise have taught me so much and have shown an unconditional love for me that means so much.  I am thankful they forgive me over and over. 

I am thankful for stories.  Other than love, I believe stories are the most precious things we have to offer to others. 

I am thankful for the many years I have to look forward to, in which I’ll get to hear many stories, laugh often, get frustrated with (but then love) this experience of being human, and keep learning, learning, learning. 


I am thankful for sunshine on my face.


I'm thankful for shoes.


I'm thankful for airplanes and for cars and for bicycles.


I'm thankful for my ears.  I love to hear voices, music, wind, birds, laughter, babies cooing, and those Kentucky summer nights when you lay in bed and hear the orchestration of millions of insects.


I'm thankful for the leopard pajama pants Cottey bought me.  I'm thankful for Cottey and for our times together.  I'm thankful for Sam.


I'm thankful for letters from Tiffany.


I'm thankful for emails from Molly.  


I'm thankful for happy marriages.  There is nothing more beautiful to me than seeing a man and a woman completely dedicated to each other because they are dedicated to God.  It is pure.  


I am thankful for the priesthood.


I am thankful for sleep.  Goodnight :) 

something to consider

I have many great professors, some of whom have become close mentors and friends.  One of them recently sent me this quote after a discussion we had about learning to love both the self and others.  

I had forgotten this quote and it was exactly what I needed to read today.  It represents a theme in my life right now--it's this theme of figuring out who I am as I recognize my abilities and my potential as God's child.

I'm training my brain (well, more-so my spirit) to learn to see both myself and other people in this light of God's understanding. (But really, it's not me training me; it's God training me.  I pray, pray, and pray some more until the Spirit gives me much-needed love and perspective.  Then I repeat the process.  Over, and over, and OVER again.  And I suppose I'll be repeating it for the rest of my life.  That's the thing about being human--we're always learning the same basic lessons, aren't we?)   


Enough of my intro.  Here's the quote:      

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others" (Marianne Williamson, Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles", Harper Collins, 1992. From Chapter 7, Section 3).