Friday, October 21, 2011

if you are Man, you should read this. if you are Woman, you should read this.

I am Woman.  

I am intelligent.
I am capable.
I am sacred.



As a woman living in the 21st century, I look back in history at the "progress" that has been made for my sex and then wonder: Why is my sex still incredibly oppressed?  Woman is still largely patronized and viewed as less valuable than Man. Furthermore, Woman is still objectified and prostituted--physically, sexually, and emotionally abused.

WHY?

I love some good feminist theories (who doesn't?), but I'm not looking for those perspectives right now.  I want perspectives from the men in my life.  Why do you think women are treated the way they are? 

A few questions you might consider:

Is it simply because of individuals?  Or is it more of a societal structural issue?

Is it lack of education--for both males and females?  (We also might ask: Does a person need to be educated in order to not only understand basic gender issues and roles, but also to reach gender awareness?)

Is it because of androcentric cultures and traditions?  If so, could a society ever NOT be androcentric?

Is sexism something inherent in Man?

In Christianity, might we discover roots of the problem in the way in which society cycles between the "Eve" model and the "Mary" model of what it means to be Woman? (The one perspective meaning we are a condemned sex due to the Fall; the other perspective meaning we are a glorified, purified, elevated sex due to the Virgin Mary)

After you've considered WHY, I have another question for you: Men, what do you do to create change?  What really makes conditions better for your girlfriends, wives, daughters, sisters, friends?  

Some questions to consider:

Should you practice old-fashioned "chivalry" to show respect?  Or is it better not to practice "chivalry" because women are "just as capable" as men?

Should you love your woman because of her gender traits that are inherently different than yours?  Or should you love her despite those gender differences?

To go further with that^ question, we might ask: Should society focus on the differences between Man and Woman, or should society act as though no differences exist (based on the idea that when we publicly acknowledge differences between Male and Female, we discriminate against women)?

What's your philosophy about porn?  Do you discourage porn as an oppressive force against women?  Or do you take the converse view that porn is a form of liberation and opportunity for women, and thus choose to actively promote porn?

Do you boycott mainstream hollywood movies that portray women as objects? Or, conversely, do you support those movies for the same reason mentioned above (because they provide a source of liberation for women)?


Okay, that's all for now.

P.S. Although I specifically asked for thoughts from men, OF COURSE I'd love to hear thoughts from women as well :)

5 comments:

  1. A lot of questions for a big problem. I see it as ancient culture brought forward. The original people culture of this continent was opposite of ours in so many ways, women were central, wealth was shared, private property was limited. The Roman Empire culture is still with us through its patriarcal religion run by men, I would say it still sets the structure in your life. Why does God send his dispensations through men in the Morman religion ?

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  2. I'll say that I think it's more of a structural issue, Jenna. But I'll also say that I don't think men know how to treat us in this day and age - because we ourselves don't know what we want. We want men to open the door for us, but we want to be treated as capable equals, which means that chivalry is "sexist." We want to be "liberated," uninhibited in doing what we want, and yet we get upset when a man in our life watches porn. We want careers, three to five kids, and a well-run house and yard. But we can't have our cake and eat it, too. It's a wonderful thing to be a woman - we can be feminine, and find joy in that part of ourselves, and yet we can scream at football games and work just as hard as any man. But we don't need to expect the world from ourselves - or men. Generally, I think they do a good job in the way they treat us. Personally, I like it when a man holds the door open for me, or helps me with something I'm carrying. I don't take it like he's saying that I'm a member of the weaker sex, and therefore I can't be allowed to do anything for myself. I think it's a great way to show respect, and it makes me respect a man a lot more, in turn.
    As for the inherent sexism in social institutions, that won't change unless we, as women, stand up for ourselves. It's only continued this long because no one has spoken loud enough against it. If we accept what we do not agree with as the norm, then we have to accept the consequences as well.

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  3. Jenna I don't mean to single out the LDS Church in this type of structure I only site it to you because it is a structure that you are involved in. Locally here in Michigan the Reformed Church has cut itself off from the original church in the Netherlands because they ordain women in the Netherlands. There are so many cultural structures that we inherit from times past before women had the right to vote even. these cultural structures change so very slowly and are resistant to change. I heard that our minds are hardwired to resist change. When a new idea comes in that conflicts with ideas we hold our pain center is activated, our pleasure center is activated when we actively resist that new idea.

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  4. Uncle George,

    I appreciated your response to this post—especially your question! It’s a very fair question to ask and please know that I wasn’t offended at all. I blog because I want people to respond and ask questions—so thank you! I just posted a response. Thanks for reading my blog; I’m thankful for your input!

    Love,
    Jenna

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  5. Koko,

    Excellent response. Very well said, especially the part that we can’t “have our cake and eat it, too.” Sometimes the messages women send about chivalry and liberation are sort of paradoxical, aren’t they? I think I feel an itch coming on—an itch to blog about the paradoxical messages we send men…

    Love you!

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